hamhigh

Sir Menzies drops in

Admin — Thu, 30 Mar 2006 16:43:00 GMT

LIBERAL Democrat Leader Sir Menzies Campbell visited the Ham&High today to put the case for his party ahead of the May 4 elections.

Among the issues Sir Menzies ventured his opinion on was the NHS black hole and the likely job losses as a result.

He revealed why he thinks local police stations are being closed and what the government is doing with the cash instead.

Sir Menzies gave his take on the current controversy surrounding party funding and put forward a radical alternative to Anti-Social Behaviour Orders.

For Sir Menzies' views on the issues that count read the interview in the April 7 edition of the Ham&High.

EXCLUSIVE: No one murdered on Hampstead Heath

Admin — Tue, 21 Mar 2006 12:11:00 GMT

THE HAM&HIGH went on to red alert this morning after hearing of a major police incident on the Heath.
Large numbers of police had cordoned off a vast area and were carrying out investigations after a body had been seen in a pond.
While various calls were made to police and Heath managers, the Ham&High sent two reporters immediately down to the scene to get the latest news, but were surprised to discover coppers supping soup from a catering van.
They were even more surprised to find investigating officer chief superintendent Jane Tennison was still in make-up.
It turned out Lynda La Plante’s popular detective show was shooting on the Heath for a new series. Reporter Marc Mullen said: “It looked more exciting than a real crime scene, except for the soup.”

Definition: C.R.A.F.T.

Admin — Fri, 03 Feb 2006 15:12:00 GMT

Reporter Marc Mullen's just been on the phone to Hamsptead poet Al Alvarez:

"He told me he was suffering from an old people's disease called CRAFT. Naively asking what that was he told me it's, 'Can't remember a f**king thing'".

Enjoy your day.

The greatest hump of all?

Admin — Wed, 21 Dec 2005 15:39:00 GMT

I have a new favourite speed hump. To find it, simply turn into Dartmouth Park Avenue from Dartmouth Park Hill and there it is, a masterpiece of modern traffic-calming creativity.

Never mind the regulations governing the permissible dimensions of humps and tables: here is an awesome hazard which is in every sense a law unto itself. One which so encapsulates our urban environment that in due course it should be uprooted and exhibited in the Tate Modern.

The hump itself rises formidably from the tarmac, raising gasps of excitement among unsuspecting passengers. Immediately afterwards, the road sinks dramatically into a Grand Canyon of a hollow, adding a spectacular ‘Beechers Brook’ effect. (For those who don’t know, Beechers Brook is the most feared obstacle on the Grand National course at Aintree because the landing side of the fence is a puny couple of feet below take-off level).

The slower you travel, the greater the sensation. As the nose of your car points towards the heavens on take-off, the G Forces at work must be extraordinary. NASA should set up a research station here.

Whoever designed and installed this particular hump should be honoured in some significant way but in fact the entire Dartmouth Park area is rapidly gaining a formidable reputation for excellence among road hump aficionados.

No ordinary humps here. These proud obstacles will test the nerve of any driver and the suspension of any modern vehicle, 4x4s included.

I’ve paid good money for less exhilarating rides at Disneyland.

Which brings me to my next point: our local authorities are surely missing out on an important revenue stream by ignoring the opportunity to make money from London’s endlessly-humped streets.

There should be maps explaining the most exciting road hump routes, available in shops alongside the guides to London’s best walks, cycle paths and pub crawls. And special buses for tourists, driven by C11 veterans.

People shouldn’t be allowed to have fun like this for free: why not install barriers on selected road hump journeys, with pay-as-you-go ticket machines, like the ones at Hampstead’s swimming ponds? And, on the really hard-core routes, photographers waiting at the end of the road to sell you Polaroid pictures of your death-defying journey.

Add a couple of teeshirt stalls (“I rode the humps on Highgate West Hill” “Road humps: the new Rock ’n’ Roll”, etc) and none of us need ever pay council tax again.

Surplus funds could be ploughed back into schemes for even more humps and speed tables. Better still, why not use some of it to fund a glitzy annual awards night for road hump design with categories for most artistic, most intimidating, most original ... and special awards for bone crunching, suspension smashing, bicycle killing, bus crippling characteristics.

I’m sure hump number one at the highest point of Dartmouth Park Avenue would be a prime contender for the biggest sackful of nominations. Unless, of course, you know better ...

Bob Antrim

Police keep us abreast of developments

haroon.siddique@archant.co.uk — Mon, 28 Nov 2005 17:21:00 GMT

Is this is Freudian slip from Marylebone's top cop in a written response to a Wood&Vale question about burglary?

Superintendent Jon Morgan said: "Inevitably we have had a busty year in respect of the priority of the fight against terrorism and I have little doubt that our focus has been diverted."

Hold very tight please: the C11 bus test

Chris Smith — Fri, 21 Oct 2005 12:25:00 GMT

Brace yourselves, ladies

Here at the Ham&High we're always looking for ways to make the website different from the newspaper, rather than just a straightforward reproduction of what you can buy in the shop.

A couple of weeks ago at our annual editorial conference, one of our sports writers suggested the future of the website might, in part, be to act like an online version of the BBC's Watchdog programme: a sort of local aggregator of gripes and groans, all carefully watched over and, where necessary, investigated, by the Ham&High newsroom. (Do you think this sounds like a good idea? (Say so)

So it was in the spirit of Anne Robinson that I ventured on to the C11 bus earlier this week, to test out the alleged 'misery' for myself, and see if it was all as bad as the Ham&High's letters page suggests.

Armed with a copy of Metro and a Global Positioning System (GPS) I plotted my route from Gospel Oak station to Swiss Cottage.

I'm pretty well jinxed in general where public transport is concerned, so it came as no great surprise as I emerged from Gospel Oak station to see the bus pulling away from the stop, with no chance of my sprinting across the 20 yards from the station exit in time.

I settled in for a long wait and was pleasantly surprised when another C11 approached not three minutes later. It wasn't crowded and I got a seat. No misery yet.

No misery, in fact, for a full ten minutes, until we got to the stop outside the Royal Free, where the doors broke: the back set wouldn't stay shut. I'm familiar with colourful language, and while the bus driver didn't add anything to my vocabulary while struggling to close the doors, he gave it a jolly good go. Five minutes of jiggling the lever in his cab, pressing the button above the doors and holding them forcibly shut finally succeeded, and we were off again.

Next obstacle: Englands Lane. Why do they run the bus down this narrow alley of a street? This, I expect, was what the lady driver of a particularly shiny silver Jaguar was thinking as she reached out of her window to pull the wing mirror in and save it from a nice new coat of red paint being applied by the side of the bus.

No more misery except for the exceptionally long phase of those traffic lights on Adelaide Road outside the Marriott. This can't be blamed on the C11 bus or its driver, but probably can be blamed on TfL, so I'm leaving it in.

I'm afraid I wasn't very good with the GPS, and I'm therefore not able to give accurate figures on kilometres per hour, but I did manage to get through the Metro from front to back, which means the journey from Gospel Oak to Swiss Cottage took just over 20 minutes.

Misery level: a bearable, if not ideal, two grimaces out of five.

Am I missing something? Is there a certain stretch of the route which is particularly terrible? (Let me know)

Next week: I voyage upon the good ship C11 from West Hampstead to Swiss Cottage.

We know who Julia Roberts' "mystery man" is

matt.eley@hamhigh.co.uk — Thu, 29 Sep 2005 16:27:00 GMT

It's not often we get Hollywood exclusives at the Ham&High - why would we need to when our own patch is so full of fascinating characters? - but here's one for you.

Superstar Julia Roberts has a nickname for Hampstead novelist Tony Parsons. The actress refers to the Man and Boy author as 'her mystery man'.

It turns out that Roberts picked up a copy of Parson's The Family Way, started reading and fell in love with it. So, as any right-thinking multi-millionaire movie star would, she bought the film rights and insisted that Parsons put together a script - a task he has just completed.

During a recent chat over a couple of cappuccinos Parsons said: "She thinks nobody's ever heard of me apart from her, she thinks discovered me, she calls me her mystery man."

Judging by the way his novels, including recently published Stories We Could Tell, fly off the shelves, it seems fair to suggest he has also found a market outside of the glitzier quarters of LA.

Read the full interview with Tony Parsons in next week's Ham&High (Oct 7).

Lessons in preventing anti-social behaviour: part 1

katie.davies@hamhigh.co.uk — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 16:48:00 GMT

Students from across the borough flocked to the mock court at Hampstead police station last Friday and police officers spoke proudly about how busy it was.

However, on the way out a crime-prevention officer handed the teenagers a variety of souvenirs, without realising one of the items might not be brilliant for preventing anti-social behaviour - a whistle.

It wasn't until the screeches of 50 rowdy teenagers armed with whistles was heard from Hampstead High Street that the officer realised his mistake and hastily put them away.

On another note, it turns out, bemusingly, that the teenagers also have a new badge of honour: as well as merrily blowing on whistles, students at the mock court event at Hampstead police station boasted that they had copies of the Ham&High articles about their rowdiness glued up in their lockers.

More on the successes of the mock courtroom in this week's Ham&High...

Lost: One shed.

Andrew Brightwell — Mon, 26 Sep 2005 14:22:00 GMT

We are keen to find the owner of a lost shed that has found its way to the front of our office.

The small shed appears to be empty and has been pushed against a tree so it is impossible to open its door (not that I tried, of course).

Its only distinguishing feature is a London Underground poster, announcing engineering works to the Jubilee line.

We were thinking about making into a nice quiet spot for the office smokers, although I understand at least one member of staff has expressed interest in moving it to their garden.

A second shed sits outside the exit to Swiss Cottage immediately outside the pub of the same name.

Net Notes: Hampstead and Highgate online this week

Chris Smith — Mon, 26 Sep 2005 14:00:00 GMT

It won't have passed you by, but Hampstead is under the Heathrow flightpath. According to John Stewart of the UK Noise Association, quoted in this Telegraph article, "The biggest recent increase in complaints has been from north London." Hampstead residents complain about excess noise? Surely not. If, however, you have anything to say about the planes over Hampstead, Highgate, or indeed anywhere in Camden, please do let us know, and we'll be only too happy to pass your comments along to BAA.

Mixed Messages carries intriguing news of a previous use for part of Hampstead Heath: as a vineyard! Can this possibly be true? Can anyone corroborate this? And if so - when and why was wine production stopped? Hamblog thinks we should be told!

Oh, Kate Moss. Kate, Kate, Kate. What have you been up to? The tabloids love you because stories about you and rolled-up banknotes sell loads and loads of copies. We, on the other hand, are just chuffed that you bring into our NW3 locus such an astonishing array of stars: just look at this roll-call from the Daily Mirror. Sometimes Heathman leaves work feeling like he's swapped jobs with the writers of Heat magazine.

The huge sculpture The Writer (also known as the giant's table and chair) remains on Parliament Hill Fields until October 9, and continues to attract the attention of newspapers and bloggers alike. According to the Independent's Boyd Tonkin, the big table, "...captures the loneliness of long-distance thinkers and creators - but also the implicit sacredness of their vocation". Since ours is not to argue with this kind of scholarly opinion, we'll just point you at this decent pic, which comes with some chat about a book fair at The Horse Hospital, Bloomsbury.

And finally... Just couldn't resist this conversation overheard by Grammar Puss on the 328 bus in West Hampstead. (GP: any problems with my lack of commas in that sentence, or should it be "...conversation, overheard by Grammar Puss, on the 328 bus..."?)

FOOTNOTES

Other Hampstead & Highgate links we found on the web this week:

1) Hampstead Heath is rhyming slang for 'teeth', from Likwid Skitz: e.g. "Look at the Hampsteads on that bird".

2) Is this TfL-recommended route the best way to cycle from South Hampstead to Couch End?

3) The Heath is the birthplace of the Mediaeval Baebes, according to the She Knows website.

More Net Notes next week...

I'm afraid Cllr Mills is out of the office at the moment...

Marc Mullen — Thu, 22 Sep 2005 08:59:00 GMT

I've just called Camden's finance chief John Mills and guess where he is... Las Vegas.

But he's not putting our council tax on pocket sevens, apparently: he's at a conference.

[pic: www.camden.gov.uk]

That crucial sporting result... the Donkey Derby

Jonathan Marciano — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 10:24:00 GMT

The first race of the day at the Muswell Hill Festival and the pressure was on. Each of us were given our donkey and a hard hat and took the long, nerve-racking walk to the start of the race. Then I got in the cart, took the reins and we were off. My donkey really went against the three newspaper competitors, keeping a quick pace. It is truly surprising how fast a donkey can go. There was a worrying moment when it decided to stop halfway through but then found a renewed bit of energy when it realised the race had not finished and made a mad dash to the finish line. In a photofinish Rocky and the Ham&High came first. It was truly incredible. My best moment was when a 10-year old came up to me and thanked me for winning him £10 on the betting. Now only if I had some of that faith and had actually backed myself.

Please Mr Murdoch, take this torture away from us

Andrew Brightwell — Mon, 12 Sep 2005 15:34:00 GMT

With the cricket going on it is proving very difficult to concentrate on the important job of writing for the Ham&High. Half of me reckons it only being available to Sky subscribers next summer is a good thing. If I’m not pacing up and down craning my neck to catch a view of the TV I’m surveying the sky in the hope that huge rain clouds are building from the south. It is easy to identify those who care about the game, too. Like me, they are consumed with nerves, staring nervously at their computer screens, gnawing what they’ve got left of their nails.

Bad light prompts play in Regent's Park

Chris Smith — Mon, 12 Sep 2005 12:18:00 GMT

The summer's second outing for big screen cricket in Regent's Park tested crowd dynamics to their limits yesterday, prompting some bizarre demonstrations of what people will do in large groups when they're bored and have supped a little too much ale.

As bad light delayed play for the third time, screen organisers offered the crowd a choice between watching either a replay of the first Test at Lord's (which England lost) or the cricketing efforts of two children, who looked about three and six years old respectively, playing with a tennis ball and a wicket made of sticks, in a corner of the park under some trees (click pic for larger version).

The crowd sensibly plumped for the latter and roared its support for the batsman, the elder of the two, who put in a sterling performance, while calling for the replacement of the bowler, who was clearly chucking the ball and not bowling it as the rules require.

This was vastly preferable to the mass game of Kicky-Ball which had preceded it, in which the whole crowd, whether it wanted to or not, had become involved in either punting a rugby ball high in the air over the assembly, or ducking said ball as it returned to earth. One of those in my party rightly observed: "I'm not sticking round here. This is going to get dangerous."

Sure enough, within five minutes the rugby ball had been joined by a couple of footballs, several tennis balls, some beer, food, frisbees, 'Fosters' inflatable surfboards and a couple of hats. We hung about warily at the back of the crowd, nervously checking the air around us for incoming ordnance. I secretly hoped for a food fight of Carry On-style proportions, but it didn't materialise.

In fairness, all this went off in the best of spirits despite the frustrating lack of play at The Oval and this web editor, for one, is hoping the big screen will be a regular fixture in the park, perhaps even for Tests played outside the capital.

I post this at lunchtime on the final day. Let the nail-biting continue.

Time to usher in some new opinions

Geoff Martin — Fri, 09 Sep 2005 11:18:00 GMT

We’ve lost two great columnists for very different reasons. Mark Seddon, former editor of Tribune, is moving to the USA. As Cllr Gerry Harrison says in a letter this week, his independent view continued a long tradition of radical debate in the Ham&High.

It’s farewell also to Brian Coleman, the London Assembly Member for Barnet and Camden, who has taken great umbrage and withdrawn his monthly column following our admittedly scathing response last week to his comments about health provision for stroke victims. This week’s Ham&High letters pages carry a selection of the many responses we had from all over the country to Mr Coleman’s comments.

Rainbow George, or George of Hampstead as he is known to thousands of radio phone-in listeners, treated me to an excellent dinner on Tuesday night, one of those balmy evenings that make Heath Street feel like the loveliest place on earth. Crooner Ronnie Carroll, who has stood (somewhat reluctantly) a couple of times for election on Ronnie’s wacky Ranbow Party ticket, joined us and when they get going together they’re the best double act since Morecambe and Wise. Had a really interesting if occasionally surreal evening and Ronnie gave me a copy of his excellent new CD for my mum back in County Antrim, who was a big fan when Ronnie was topping the charts in the early Sixties. I defy anyone to listen to it and not think instantly of Frank Sinatra.

I went to see a film on Monday night and discovered my new favourite hotel into the bargain. The impossibly chic Soho in, well, where else but Soho, makes better-known establishments look as if they’re marooned in the Middle Ages. It also has a plush 200-seater private cinema where I saw Goal!, Danny Cannon’s thoroughly enjoyable and almost believable film about a young Mexican who takes the Premiership by storm. The match scenes, some of them from actual Premiership clashes, are superbly filmed.

Talking of football again, the lads in the office have been very gracious about Northern Ireland’s 1-0 win over England on Wednesday night. I’m still in shock. So momentous an event was this in the annals of football history that I tried hard to find a way of mentioning it in the Ham&High this week, but just couldn’t pin down that local angle. Still, the beauty of a blog ....!